Costumed crusaders

I have relied on my college education to help me acquire gainful employment, work out complex statistical analysis (ha! Just kidding, Professor Robert E. Lee--not joking--tried his best but couldn't turn me into a statistical wizard) and provide a good foundation for understanding the world around me. Until recently, I thought my alma mater had given me everything I needed to go out into the world and whip up a mean editorial or communications packet, but I'm beginning to think she failed me.

As a marketing minor, I thought I understood the marketing beast (even though the Husband did complete most of my senior level marketing class homework...let's be honest...I had no business being in that class) but, lately, I've been confounded by what seems to be a widely accepted form of guerrilla marketing here in the Kansas City metro area: the costumed street stander.

It all started last summer. I was driving home when out of the corner of my eye, I saw what appeared to be a woman wearing a banana costume on the side of the street. Thinking this was surely a mirage, I did a slow drive-by and confirmed that it definitely was a woman in a banana costume. She was holding a sign advertising the crazy (hence "bananas") low prices of the produce at a nearby grocery store. Naturally, my first thought was: how many bananas must this grocery store sell in order to pay for a banana costume? I called the Husband immediately to report the banana lady sighting and, of course, he didn't believe me. I recall his exact words were: "There's no way there's a woman in a banana costume on the street. You are making that up." I knew I needed proof so I pulled a U-turn and did another drive-by with my camera poised and ready to capture a photo of the banana lady and capture it I did.


A few weeks later, I was cruising around when I spotted a person in a chicken costume holding a sign that read: Eat at Granny's. I have no idea if Granny's specializes in chicken or if the chicken costume was the only one on sale at Marvin's Costume Emporium. From the menacing glare of the chicken, I took his message to be more of a command than a suggestion. For the record: I did not eat at Granny's nor do I have any plans to eat at Granny's, menacing chicken or not.


Apparently this trend of employing costumed characters to inform Kansas' traveling public of low prices on bananas, generally irritated non-water fowl and other products is not limited to the summer months. As tax season rolls around, Liberty Tax has taken to employing individuals to don crudely constructed Statue of Liberty regalia and wave to passersby on the street. No matter the temperatures, these Lady Liberty impersonators brave the elements to let us know that Liberty Tax wants so badly to do our taxes that they will pay people minimum wage to dress in drag on street corners. My particular favorite Liberty Tax guy wears a black ski mask and doesn't wave. I'm actually not sure if he was hired by Liberty Tax or if he just held up the liquor store on the corner and is trying to blend in with his surroundings to evade police. Curious.

And just this week I was making my way to the dentist's office when I pulled up to a stop light and witnessed a Liberty Tax guy engaged in some seriously risque dancing on the street corner. Had the Infant been in the car with me I would have shielded his eyes to protect his innocence. There was so much gyrating and pelvic thrusting, I had to wonder if he could be cited for conduct unbecoming of a national symbol. Had I not known about Liberty Tax's costumed campaign, I may have thought this individual was selling something far more salacious than tax services.

I cannot help but wonder how many people are persuaded to buy bananas, eat at Granny's or get their taxes done by Liberty Tax because one of these costumed crusaders convinced them to do so. And this practice seems so pervasive that I wonder if maybe I missed something in a Marketing 101 class that predicted that all marketing roads would lead to costume marketing. I may as well have gotten an online degree.