Stapler mystery solved

If you would like the origins of the stapler that was discovered on the porch steps in my backyard last week to remain a mystery then do not read any further. For those inquiring minds that could not possibly enjoy their Thanksgiving turkey and stuffing without knowing where the stapler came from, have I got a gem of a tale for you!

In addition to the mystery stapler on the back steps, a mini pitch fork type tool was also left in the backyard. Since our neighbor kid had done some earlier work in the backyard (none of which required a stapler...or a pitch fork for that matter), I figured I'd start with him. I'd told him all week to come by and pick up his tools but he's 14 so, of course, he forgot. Whilst DJ Sammy was taking a break from mixing sweet tunes to nap, I journeyed across the street to the neighbor kid's house to find he and his twin brother on the roof trying to hang Christmas lights. The Christmas light hanging has been going on all week and every time I look out of the window I'm convinced I'm going to see one or both of them in a mangled heap in their front yard. On Sunday, Benny K went over to see if they were in compliance with OSHA regulations and found their "safety" practices left much to be desired.

Today, there was a single rope hanging across the roof with a metal swing dangling from the end of it. I commented that the situation did not look safe and one of the twins said that the rope could hold 600 pounds. Since the rope was in no way tethered to either boy, I asked how the rope did them any good? The shorter of the twins said it was perfectly safe because they were staying within an arm's length of the rope at all times so if they started to fall, they would just grab it. I said that sounded like it might work if they had ninja-like reflexes and they assured me that was the case. Oh, and the swing was attached to the end of the rope because they hadn't gotten around to cutting it off yet (I don't even know what that means or why the swing needed a 50 foot nylon rope attachment but the boys are 14 and I'm sure there is much I do not understand) and they assured me they were not using the swing as a harness to hang off of the roof. I'm not convinced.

I digress...

The stapler! After the conversation about the unsafe Christmas light hanging boondoggle, I asked the taller twin if the stapler belonged to him. This is how the conversation went (I will remind you, the twins are 14):

Me: Hey, I found this stapler in the back yard with some staples, does it belong to you?
Tall twin: Oh yeah, thanks, that is mine.
Me: What exactly were you stapling in our backyard?
Tall twin: Oh nothing. I found the stapler in my pocket while I was working and just set it down on the steps. I must have forgotten about it.
Me: You found the stapler in your pocket? Why did you have a stapler with extra staples in your pocket?
Tall twin: I don't know. I guess I was stapling something at some point.

Touche, tall twin, touche.